And just like that …

It’s a New Year and a new decade. I wonder what the twenties will bring? I’ve been a published author for a decade and one year, because my first novel was published in 2009. In that time, I’ve had 12 novels, a couple of novellas, a LOT of short stories (an actual shit-ton), a book of poetry published – and that’s just the published work. There’s still more that I’ve written and sat on, or put away, or shelved because it’s not time yet.

I haven’t exactly been sitting on my hands but I still feel like I could be doing so much better. New Years Day started with me feeling like I’ve dropped the ball and that’s disappointing.
Mostly it’s because I didn’t get the 12th Byte book finished by the end of the year. I’m not far off (in writers terms) but I didn’t get there. Sometimes it frustrates me that I can’t just ‘bang out a novel’. I made a comment recently about my books requiring too much brain power to ever be fast to write – it is actually true even though it sounds like a bit of a wanker thing to say. πŸ™‚ One a year is doable for me in my genre, at the moment. Other people can probably write more than that – because they understand the magic of planning and the wizardry of sticking to a plan! [Maybe one day?]

I belong to a few FB groups where people just seem to smash out novels in weeks … and then sell ZILLIONS!
I know, that they’re not writing what I write, they’re not writing anything over 50K, they’re cookie-cutter writers, they’re not me, they’re planners, there is fuck all research involved in their chosen genre and sub-genres. BUT, I still see it and feel like I’m failing.
It’s a writer thing. It’s really hard to NOT compare yourself and your journey with others who seem to be doing so much better so much faster.

There is one group where they post their sales and screenshots of the money they’re making – to be honest, I have no clue how they’re doing so well. I am baffled. I don’t even know where to begin to up my game and make real money. (Probably should stop giving books away, but, that’s never been the problem … finding my readers without spending money I don’t have has always been the problem!)
Some days (a lot in the last few weeks, if I’m honest) I’d like to bash out a couple of romance novels and make some cash. Two things stop me – 1. I’m shitty at writing romance – mine end up with five sub-plots, murder, kidnapping, and have to work damn hard to find a happy ending. πŸ™‚ and 2. I’m shitty at planning.
I’d like to be able to plan a novel and then still feel inspired enough to write it … but I plan a novel and then I’m bored, I don’t wanna write something when it’s all laid out for me and I know what happens.
What’s the point in that, personally? I mean really? If I’m not entertained how will anyone else be?
Maybe this is the year I get over that hurdle and figure it out? Or not!
Guess we’ll find out??


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.